February horoscopes
Aries
Time to network! Get out there and butt some heads, find those connections, because it's social time. Social networking is the next big thing and you want to be part of the ride. Impress your friends with this knowledge.
Taurus
It's career ambition time, so climb that corporate ladder. Anything goes this month. ANYTHING. It's a short month and March should handle any residue shame.
Gemini
This is yet another twin related prediction; it's time to grab someone of the opposite sex. That's right, you'll make the perfect team. You'll both be the token representative of your given gender.
Cancer
Everybody loves a new client and this month is cancer's time to shine. Ditch any outstanding work and jump ship to bigger and better things. Your collegues will understand.
Leo
Don't worry about the gemini's, the power-couple you're about to make this month will have you brushing the dizzying heights of temptation. Sit back and enjoy the ride, it'll only last 28 days. Marriage Counselling Sydney, Crows Nest: 1300 830 552
Virgo
Everyone knows you're a pain in the arse, so this is one month to embrace it. You're ruled by Mercury, who as the messenger of the gods, which can only imply that you will have some success in communicating your obsessive behaviour.
Libra
Fun, passion and play. Summer's not over yet, so get out there. This is your "chuck-a-sickie" month. You should have 10 brand new sick days tucked up your belt. They're not going to spend themselves.
Scopio
This is your stay-at-home month! Enjoy crafts, cooking or a good book. At least convince yourself this as every check of your smartphone will remind you that no one wants to spend time with you this month. Count your blessings that work drags you out of your house.
Sagittarius
You're the only one who's going to have any good ideas this month. Don't waste your time closing issues, start creating them. The 11th hour is where all the work is done anyway. Make the most of it.
Capricorn
I hope you can juggle, because that's the sort of cheap parlor trick you're going to need to draw attention away from the mountain of tasks you didn't close out in January.
Aquarius
It's time to set those personal goals! No doubt, your manager is hassling you with the task of setting a couple of meaningless, unchieveable goals for 2015. You'll need a power-source this month so get a few beers down before commiting to them.
Pisces
I'm not sure how you could ever think you were a mermaid, you have legs and would most likely drown if you spent any significant time under the water. All February is going to do is remind you of every failed New Year's resolution.
* Credits to Josh Shardlow. Credits only, he just came up with the idea.
